Archive for the ‘Campaign Silliness’ Category

Knowledge Yourself.

It’s a Harlem-ism I picked up from a guy selling books on the street one day.  I like it despite its grammar issues.  I mean why can’t knowledge be a verb?

“Hey D. Zizzles, whatchya doin?”

“Oh you know… just knowledging myself…”

On second thought it might be a little creepy in that context…but even so.  Educating yourself is, as we’ve said here at Bandit Pulpit, one of the primary responsibilities of the citizenry.  However it’s no secret that time and motivation are scarce in a world where most of us are too busy with our lives to tend to the life of our Republic.  Fair Enough. This begs the question, how do we make it simpler and quicker for people to educate themselves without sitting through the inane chatter of the media?

Check it out:  http://www.opencongress.org/person/compare

Where does it lead?  To a new feature of Open Congress that allows you to compare the voting record of two politicians side by side and click through for information on what each of the votes was for.  Though the comparison has some obvious flaws in terms of presentation/clarity of information, the potential for this to become an incredibly useful time-saver both for news organizations and private citizens, should be clear.

Here’s the direct link to a McCain/Obama comparison.

Furthermore, according to the e-mail I received, they are planning two new features post-election day:

1)  A new way to save and share information with friends (facebook app?  mobile app? twitter feed?!  The possibilities are endless!)

2)  A “bird’s-eye” view of data about congress generated by the Open Congress community.  (Not entirely sure what this will entail; this is an awfully vague description.  You can imagine it may be a sort of congressional dashboard that tracks overall trends in legislation, appropriations, etc., by categories or something to that effect.)

Lastly, here’s an enlightening blog post with a side by side comparison on key votes that pertain to issues mentioned during the debates and over the course of the campaign trail.  http://www.opencongress.org/articles/view/728

Enjoy and let us know your thoughts!


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With less than a week left to go, I thought I would take a gander and see how YOU found this socialist, plumber hating website (even though I personally know a plumber who is quite good at fixing shit).

Anywho, here we go!

·      bandit pulpit

·      banditpulpit                       

·      corn holes                       

·      bandid pulpit           

·      jesus satire                       

·      cornholes                       

·      https://banditpulpit.wordpress.com           

·      reviews of patriotic grace by peggy noonan

·      futures modernization act           

·      bandir pakistan           

·      what is the main idea of the bold bandit                       

·      palin pakistan guy asked question           

·      generation gap in voting           

·      obama commodity futures modernization ac                       

·      palin whiz pakistan           

·      bandit world           

·      critique of peggy noonan, patriotic grace

·      patriotic grace peggy noonan           

·      john mccain fascist whackadoo           

·      guy who asked palin about pakistan                       

·      commodity futures modernization act credit                       

·      rush +limblog                       

·      banditpulpit.wordpress.com                       

·      commodity futures modernization act, obama                       

·      bush “fundamental of the economy”                       

·      september 15, 2008 commodity futures modernization act                       

·      ‘commodity futures modernization act + mccain           

·      fundamentals investment banks september                       

·      bush & the bailout bandits           

·      pulpit+bulletproof           

·      https://banditpulpit.wordpress.com                       

·      glittering generalities


I would have to say that “Jesus Satire,” “glittering generalities,” and “John McCain Fascist Whackadoo” are the winners. Although, it does make me laugh that so many people have found our site by using the search term(s) “corn holes”/”cornholes”… With all of the names of frumpy politicos on our blog, I cringe to think of the combinations that could bring us more traffic.

Spread the word. We’ll keep going after the election. Stay tuned for more coverage and comment as we inch closer to the big day!

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A local school district official confirmed after the event that of the 6,000 people estimated by the fire marshal to be in attendance this morning, more than 4,000 were bused in from schools in the area. The entire 2,500-student Defiance School District was in attendance, the official said, in addition to at least three other schools from neighboring districts, one of which sent 14 buses.

Compare this with the tens of thousands Obama routinely draws, and you wonder how the hell the polls are even so tight.

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This would be hilarious even coming from Bill O’Reily or Sean Hannity. That it’s coming from a TV news anchor (not an analyst, mind you) makes this clip simultaneously hilarious and chilling in its are-you-shittin’-me quotient.

Check out this idiot from some station in Florida. One gets the sense she’d been rehearsing these questions for weeks, waiting for her chance to finally “stick it” to Obama and his socialist lackey Joe Biden. But give Biden mad credit for seeing right past this “hard-hitting” line of questioning and calling this whackjob out for her laughably over-the-top Fox News audition.

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Nancy “nose job” Pffffffff-otenhauer has a fucked up view of Virginia:

Several(probably an understatement) other blogs have picked up this clip but I can’t help but post it here. Nanc is suggesting Virginia is basically two entities: real(southern VA) and fake(I’m just going with the opposite of real) Virginia. It must be nice to divide a state into regions that support your party.

That’s not how it works. Sorry nose job, in the context of the electoral college, states are atomic units. They cannot be divided(physics geeks, don’t give me shit on this, you of all people know what I mean).

About the nose job stuff…I live in Southern California. If I were Nacy Pfotenhauer I might characterize this region of California as “Narcissism USA.” That’s just how it works out here. When I see someone, no matter what they’re saying, I immediately evaluate whether or not they’ve “had work done.” Nancy, the only person I can think of with a more obvious nose job is carrot top.

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This is what I’m talking about…

Yeah, well... McCain's middle name is Sidney.... I bet he's a gay.

Yeah, well... McCain's middle name is Sidney... I bet he's a gay.

Yeah, yeah… It’s some idiot’s sign in the crowd, but anyone who has ever been to a campaign rally knows that you go through multiple layers of security, and there are campaign staffers/political operatives all throughout the crowd handing out “home made” and mass produced campaign signs, and snatching up those that they disapprove of.

Oh, and as reported by The Huffington Post,

On Sunday, McCain refused an opportunity to criticize the state chair of the Virginia GOP, who compared Obama to Bin Laden, since “both … have friends that have bombed the Pentagon,” a reference to Ayers. Asked whether that was appropriate, McCain only said : “I have to look at the context of his remarks.”

Right. McCain says there is nothing to be afraid of with Barack Obama as President…. EXCEPT THAT HE IS JUST LIKE OSAMA BIN LADEN!

John McCain and his staff know that funny names and brown skin scare you, and they will continue to allow this sort of behavior to continue so long as they see it as an electoral advantage.

Here’s my final thought on all of this… I had toyed with the idea of starting a political blog for a few years, and the urge would hit me almost every week during the primaries and over the summer, but I never acted on it. However, that all changed when I was driving home from work one evening and I heard a report on the radio from a McCain rally where some knuckle-dragging douchebag shouted out “SUPPORT OBAMA, VOTE MUSLIM,” after which there was a bunch of LOL’ing and knee-slapping by a bunch of like-minded bigots. Needless to say, I nearly drove my car off of the road when I heard the comment and reaction.

We have a serious problem in this country… Obama isn’t a Muslim, and the fact that such an argument is being used to sway voters highlights the incredible ignorance that plagues our country. An ignorance that has played a major role in the failed GOP and neocon policies of the past 8 years. And it was with that thought that sparked Bandit Pulpit and brought us all together. Hopefully, our site will succeed in quashing the intolerance and lies being exploited by those who will do ANYTHING to stay in power.

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Many on the far left will, however I am not going to call the Republican Presidential Nominee a fascist… But, Jesus Christ are these rallies scary. I don’t think its a secret that we here at Bandit Pulpit aren’t the biggest fans of the self-proclaimed greatest Maverick of all time, but none of us would go to a rally and yell “KILL HIM,” “TREASON,” “TERRORIST,” or “OFF WITH HIS HEAD.” And I can’t speak for everyone else here, but if any candidate I was supporting intimated that John McCain was a terrorist or hated his country and people, then I wouldn’t support them. So, I will NOT call John McCain a fascist. I will NOT insist that McCain is pallin’ around with terrorists. I will NOT call John McCain and Palin racists, but one has to wonder what the hell is going on. Seasoned politicians and campaign managers are well aware of the messages they are sending out to the base, and I suspect the McCain campaign is no different.

So, I cannot deny the fact that McCain and Palin are playing on the fears, misconceptions, and deep seated hatred held by many in our country. McCain cannot win on the issues. McCain can not win in the debates. McCain cannot win with personality. But McCain and Palin can win by exploiting the fact that there are many people in this country who would rather die than see a President who is not white. But how do they do this? They stir crowds into a fury  by asking “who is Barack Obama?” and insisting that he is close with terrorists who hate our country. They nurture the idea in parts of this country that there is something so different about black people that make them dangerous, and un-American. While it goes unsaid, the message is clear… Barack Obama is not like you, and you should not only disagree with him, you should fear him. Barack Obama supports terrorism. Barack Obama will take your country away from you. Barack Obama and his supporters must be stopped.

Until this point, I have simply been disgusted by McCain’s campaign tactics. However, now I am actually scared of what could happen to Barack Obama, his family, his staff, and his supporters. And I’m not alone, just take a look at your daily paper, or take some time to check out Politico.com. This is not the kind of campaign that McCain should be proud of, and he should discontinue these practices now if he is really man of strong character he claims to be.

While McCain has actually come out and told a crowd at one of his rallies that they should not be afraid of Barack Obama, he was instantly BOOED. And let’s be honest, McCain doesn’t mean it. If he did, he wouldn’t approve ads like THIS or THIS. McCain says things like that to his crowds because he knows he is catching shit for it from the press. However, McCain knows EXACTLY what he is doing. Incite fear, incite anger, incite hatred, stop Obama, but then talk out of the other side of your mouth to deflect any blame. He doesn’t want people to just dislike Obama, he wants them to hate him because YOU have made the decision to based on slick campaigning, propaganda that questions Obama’s character/patriotism, political double-talk, deception, and downright distortions and lies that insist the Democratic Nominee is associated with terrorists.

So, in closing, I am not going to call McCain a fascist, but I cannot ignore the fact that the tactics currently being used by the Republican candidate are dangerous and despicable… There are those on the left who have, and who will insist that McCain is a racist and a fascist, but that would be just as terrible as what the McCain campaign is doing right now. Frankly, I expect more out of an American hero and so should you.

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