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Posts Tagged ‘McCain’

 

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That’s right, we’re calling. If you think about it, it’s not really a ballsy call. CNN just gave Obama Iowa which brings him up to 206. Once Washington, Oregon and California come in, it’s locked.

About a half an hour ago or so, Patton Oswalt summed up McCain’s chances by quoting Dan Rather:

Dan Rather update: “In poker terms, what John McCain is doing is trying to draw the proverbial inside straight. In Magic: The Gathering terms, he’s attacking an Ice Wyvvyrn with a Hedge Dwarf. In ‘male runaways I’ve got locked in my basement’ terms, he’s trying to chew through the restraining collar while wearing punishment socks.

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Nancy “nose job” Pffffffff-otenhauer has a fucked up view of Virginia:

Several(probably an understatement) other blogs have picked up this clip but I can’t help but post it here. Nanc is suggesting Virginia is basically two entities: real(southern VA) and fake(I’m just going with the opposite of real) Virginia. It must be nice to divide a state into regions that support your party.

That’s not how it works. Sorry nose job, in the context of the electoral college, states are atomic units. They cannot be divided(physics geeks, don’t give me shit on this, you of all people know what I mean).

About the nose job stuff…I live in Southern California. If I were Nacy Pfotenhauer I might characterize this region of California as “Narcissism USA.” That’s just how it works out here. When I see someone, no matter what they’re saying, I immediately evaluate whether or not they’ve “had work done.” Nancy, the only person I can think of with a more obvious nose job is carrot top.

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Many on the far left will, however I am not going to call the Republican Presidential Nominee a fascist… But, Jesus Christ are these rallies scary. I don’t think its a secret that we here at Bandit Pulpit aren’t the biggest fans of the self-proclaimed greatest Maverick of all time, but none of us would go to a rally and yell “KILL HIM,” “TREASON,” “TERRORIST,” or “OFF WITH HIS HEAD.” And I can’t speak for everyone else here, but if any candidate I was supporting intimated that John McCain was a terrorist or hated his country and people, then I wouldn’t support them. So, I will NOT call John McCain a fascist. I will NOT insist that McCain is pallin’ around with terrorists. I will NOT call John McCain and Palin racists, but one has to wonder what the hell is going on. Seasoned politicians and campaign managers are well aware of the messages they are sending out to the base, and I suspect the McCain campaign is no different.

So, I cannot deny the fact that McCain and Palin are playing on the fears, misconceptions, and deep seated hatred held by many in our country. McCain cannot win on the issues. McCain can not win in the debates. McCain cannot win with personality. But McCain and Palin can win by exploiting the fact that there are many people in this country who would rather die than see a President who is not white. But how do they do this? They stir crowds into a fury  by asking “who is Barack Obama?” and insisting that he is close with terrorists who hate our country. They nurture the idea in parts of this country that there is something so different about black people that make them dangerous, and un-American. While it goes unsaid, the message is clear… Barack Obama is not like you, and you should not only disagree with him, you should fear him. Barack Obama supports terrorism. Barack Obama will take your country away from you. Barack Obama and his supporters must be stopped.

Until this point, I have simply been disgusted by McCain’s campaign tactics. However, now I am actually scared of what could happen to Barack Obama, his family, his staff, and his supporters. And I’m not alone, just take a look at your daily paper, or take some time to check out Politico.com. This is not the kind of campaign that McCain should be proud of, and he should discontinue these practices now if he is really man of strong character he claims to be.

While McCain has actually come out and told a crowd at one of his rallies that they should not be afraid of Barack Obama, he was instantly BOOED. And let’s be honest, McCain doesn’t mean it. If he did, he wouldn’t approve ads like THIS or THIS. McCain says things like that to his crowds because he knows he is catching shit for it from the press. However, McCain knows EXACTLY what he is doing. Incite fear, incite anger, incite hatred, stop Obama, but then talk out of the other side of your mouth to deflect any blame. He doesn’t want people to just dislike Obama, he wants them to hate him because YOU have made the decision to based on slick campaigning, propaganda that questions Obama’s character/patriotism, political double-talk, deception, and downright distortions and lies that insist the Democratic Nominee is associated with terrorists.

So, in closing, I am not going to call McCain a fascist, but I cannot ignore the fact that the tactics currently being used by the Republican candidate are dangerous and despicable… There are those on the left who have, and who will insist that McCain is a racist and a fascist, but that would be just as terrible as what the McCain campaign is doing right now. Frankly, I expect more out of an American hero and so should you.

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Hello, friend

"Hello, friend"

Against a timetable for withdrawal from Iraq
Against bailout of AIG
Against attacks on terrorists inside Pakistan
Against regulation in the financial markets
Against negative campaigning
Against Bush tax cuts
Against overturning Roe v. Wade
Against torture of detainees by military personnel
Against ethanol use in gasoline
Against speaking at Bob Jones University
Critic and foe of George W. Bush

"Wait, let's start over. Hello, friend."

"Wait, let's start over."

For a timetable for withdrawal from Iraq
For bailout of AIG
For attacks on terrorists inside Pakistan
For regulation in the financial markets
Not against negative campaigning
For Bush tax cuts
For overturning Roe v. Wade
Not against torture of detainees by non-military personnel
For ethanol use in gasoline
For speaking at Bob Jones University
Man-crush on Dubya

To blave

"To blave."

Feel free to add to our list… There are more out there!

 

 

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So, how do you recover from saying that the fundamentals of our economy are still strong on the same day that the one of the country’s largest investment banks collapses and the stock market drops over 500 points? Well attack the opposition for pointing out your blunder, of course!

“The McCain-Palin campaign responded that Obama had both ‘inflated his own resume’ and disparaged American workers [by arguing with McCain that the fundamentals of the economy are not currently strong] with his attacks on McCain, who had revised his earlier claim that the fundamental of the economy are strong to state that, in fact, it is American workers who are strong. ‘Barack Obama offered nothing new except for sharp criticisms of the most fundamental elements of the American economy and pessimism about genuine efforts to restore our country’s prosperity,’ McCain-Palin spokesman Tucker Bounds said.” Full article here

Shocking, isn't it?

Shocking, isn't it?

So, a point of clarification: the fundamentals of our economy are you guys! Gee, what a swell guy… thinkin’ so much of us… except you 6.1% who can’t seem to find work for some reason. F you guys… Stop bilking the government for those fat unemployment checks, and stop calling McCain out for being an economic dummy.

On Tuesday, McCain even came out and called for a commission, much like the 9/11 commission, to investigate what in tarnation is going on! Well let me help McCain out with that… Phil Gramm, the man who called the fundamentals of our economy a “nation of whiners” and currently co-chairs McCain’s campaign (and has served as his economic advisor), helped push through the Commodity Futures Modernization Act while he was a US senator. This act, which was attached to an omnibus spending bill (that was virtually bulletproof due to the fact that it HAD to pass), allowed for unregulated credit default swaps. These swaps are purchased by financial institutions to protect their high-risk investments… However, since Gramm’s legislation kept these swaps unregulated, no one was able to ensure that the reserves existed to cover potential losses… Smart. Go Gramm. With that in mind, how do you feel about Gramm directing McCain’s economic policy?

So, to recap… the word “fundamentals” is synonymous with “American workers,” the name “Tucker” is fast becoming a name for ass-hats, Phil Gramm thinks you’re a pussy, and one of the people running to be the leader of this country needs a commission to tell him and his advisors (like Phil Gramm) what’s wrong with our economy.

Someone get the McCain campaign a mirror…

…Or perhaps a few textbooks you might have sitting around.

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